Prepare to be underwhelmed.

2007-03-23T05:37:00.000-07:00

These months have been exhausting, but lovely just the same. All and all of my heart to anyone who said a hello, bothered to smile, stopped to talk, gave a hug. The little things, I hope you all know they were more than enough.

I apologize for not being able to disclose my private blog address to many of you who have asked for it, but please understand there are things I would prefer for less to know. Might start a public photo LJ soon though, watch for it :)

---------------------------------------

There are voids that I constantly seek to fill, but the number is dwindling. Grateful is an understatement but I can't seem to find another word to describe how I feel about having someone to love me regardless. That I might say whatever I feel in the heat of the moment, that I might do the silliest, most regrettable things; and yet He's always there, listening, watching, forgiving.
He has taught me to sympathize, taught me that it is not my place to judge, taught me how to give love and be less afraid to receive it.
One hard knock after another has only served to bring me closer to the Lord, and I am happy. I can finally and surely say that I am.

And to the one who has taught me to notice and appreciate the little things around me so much more:
Keep that heart together, love
Because we'll be okay in the end; time will tell
(It's the only thing left without secrets)

Stay happy and safe, everyone. God bless :)

2007-01-26T07:47:00.000-08:00

Dear Friend,
you're doing yourself a great injustice by ripping me off.
You would be so special, if you just tried a little more with individuality.
I think you could be such an amazing girl to get to know, but our history proves we can't be and stay friends.
I just wish you'd be a little more self-respecting. They're going to like you still, maybe much more than they already do.
There are many things I should like to say sorry to you for; how I insulted you the first time I confronted you, how I reacted in anger when I heard the comments you made to our mutual friends.

Maybe one day you'll forgive me and we'll finally get along.

Till then, God bless.

2007-01-14T00:00:00.000-08:00

Out of the blue a hello. Albeit not too cheerful a one.

To put it mildly: I find some of my readers extremely distasteful, although I know it's my fault for allowing myself to be linked. Therefore I have gotten me and my friends a livejournal.

I'm currently undecided on my blogging status, and for that reason I might still post here occasionally. If you're confident that I like you enough, ask me for my lj. Otherwise, check back here for my Mood:Blogger posts (rare, unless I'm eager to make a point to the readers here).

Crystal? Good.

God Bless to all and much of my love to a few.

2006-12-13T06:37:00.000-08:00

I'M GOING TO KILL MYSELF!!!!

Okay not really, but I got your attention didn't I? Sorry people, I sho mean I gib eu all false hope. Wor.

I did get mud on my heels though. Ewwww I hate my life :(

Kidding again...... LAUGH I TELL YOU LAUGH.

Anyway lookiehere Chew, I finally know what I want from Sushi Land. Peanut butter! With nuts alright, or else I'll sock you. Hmm peanut butter gooooood. Otherwise some Yohji Yamamoto will suffice, I guess :(
nutty peanut butter>yohji yamamoto
See you in a week. Or two? Uhhhhhhh

+I'll miss you Giamy Nanay. Aw be moved.

2006-12-07T05:53:00.000-08:00

Alex: Wait, Mother Teresa? She's dead right?

I miss Twee but it's been only hours I miss Pimmy I want my Overshines, Irish accent I need my fix of obliques I can't won't don't give a flying fuck about the ass-ugly girl who keeps trying too hard she keeps trying too hard I'm confused I'm a mess but I'm the mess all of you choose to read to rip off to view though this blog was never meant for you I see your entries I know what you all take away from me I choose to ignore it only because you're so small in my eyes what's your name what you like what you do so fit your commas in where you deem fit because as usual

I don't care but you think I do

There's nothing else to say although I'm not yet spent because I'm having one of my I-hate-the-world moments and I can't phrase (cover your eyes, kids) "fuck you all" nicely.

I'm sorry this doesn't happen often

I'm sorry? Right, I laugh, FUCK YOU ALL

2006-12-03T00:14:00.000-08:00

hey fifi rawrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrz

my namez is tzelin :D
hello i'm here to guestblog.
youknow why?
because i'm KOOL.
i'm currently very incensed,
becus guorui forced me into something that i HATE.
alright, fifi
and no,you cant draw on my ear you dufus.

2006-12-03T00:02:00.000-08:00

HELLO STEFFI!I'M GOING TO DRAW A RAINBOW FOR YOU:

I'M DRESSING UP AS A LOLITA FARMER FOR TMR'S HALLOMAS!

OKAY THAT BEAUTIFUL RAINPOW is your xmas present! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

bye bye , from limei

2006-11-29T23:55:00.000-08:00

"OMG OBLIQUE HEAVEN! START COUNTING GIRLS START COUNTING!! 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 7, UHHH 182!!"
---Laurennnn

2006-11-29T22:11:00.000-08:00

Missed me, kiddies?
Nothing interesting's happened as of late, except my mum killed a bird with her golf ball.

2006-11-18T05:41:00.000-08:00

Go cry about it why don't you?
My dear, we're slow dancing in a burning room
Don't you think we oughta know by now,
Don't you think we should've learned somehow?

2006-11-10T02:02:00.000-08:00

"To fear love is to fear life, and those who fear life are already three parts dead."
---Bertrand Russell

Shame.

2006-11-09T07:45:00.000-08:00

I feel One Tree Hill-ish. And bored.

Guy: Buy you a drink?
Brooke: Okay, guy in need of a clue. Here's one. Women send signals. That was a brush off. Before you dip into your shallow pool of wit let me paint us a picture and save us both the trouble. Here's your evening. You are going to slink back off to your buddies, laugh this off, get wasted, go home, and make nice with yourself. But don't be thinking of me, because even your fantasy of me, isn't interested in you.

Dan Scott: You're full of crap.
Coach Whitey Durham: It comes with old age, Danny, constipation.

Brooke: Lucas! Do not make me come in there with you! If you stay in there any longer, you're going to use up all the hot water if you haven't already!
[she sticks her hand into the shower]
Brooke: Oh, my God! That's cold water. You're taking a cold shower! Ew. Well, the next time you have a wet dream, tell Peyton I said hi!

Well Scriptwriter-Caterer Chew and I whiled away the afternoon with Pasir Ris Beach Season Three-and-a-half. Was thinking, would be pleased if my character was killed off. Then we could do one of those "life flashes before eyes" gigs. I'd gladly provide the memories.

Like how I couldn't stop disturbing Limei once and learnt a very valuable lesson. That is; never scorn The L-meister (Ha! Pun!) because she Will Fart In Your General Direction.

And how I mock-punched Bitchy Girl Number 1 during the rehersals perfectly and on Night Itself socked her for-real-on-accident. This reminds me, I will have to reprise my role as Sue tomorrow and mock-punch Tzelin, the new Bitchy Girl Number 1. I say mock regrettably.

Oh wow it's getting late. Goeth I to be one with the vegetables, then! (Move over Shakespeare)

2006-11-06T06:55:00.000-08:00

Take comfort in the fact we'll always find out in the end. After all, "time and time and time will tell".
It's the only thing left in this world without secrets.

2006-11-05T02:13:00.000-08:00

BOLD AS LOVE

2006-11-05T01:51:00.000-08:00

He was there.

Said, I can make you a miracle worker, just imagine the possibilities. So much potential in this world, so much that would be yours by the end of it all.

The world at my feet, not so bad a thought at all.

But, again he spoke, here's the deal: You have to tell me the first miracle you intend to perform. Then I'll decide whether to make you one.

Thought about it.

Could bring back the dead. Could do away with poverty. Could repair the damage global warming has caused (Ha!). Could annihilate paedophiles, racists, psychopaths.

Said,

I want to slaughter Hope.
Suck it out of everyone so nobody would ever be disappointed again.

Suddenly Everyone was hollowed out, slumping shells devoid of colour.
Monochrome.

Snap back.

He was gone.

Guess my expertise just doesn't lie in miracle-working.

2006-11-05T01:43:00.001-08:00

"Love lost is still love. It takes a different form, that's all. You can't
see their smile or bring them food or tousle their hair or move them around a
dance floor. But when those senses weaken, another heightens. Memory. Memory
becomes your partner. You nurture it. You hold it. You dance with it. Life has
to end. Love doesn't."

Mitch Albom

Anger is a mould that crushes and reshapes your backbone into a slouch; the good thing is that you might heal, but only if you manage to leave it behind. The question might be, how do you?

When disappointment nestles in your chest and weighs down so heavily it crushes all but a minimal amount of air in your lungs, is it really worth it? God, I hate the dull throbbing behind my eyes.
Tell us, tell us how to break out of the mould.

But I think the question really is, do you want to?

I don't know, I still don't know.

Because all too often, I'm disgusted by myself. And you.

2006-10-29T06:15:00.000-08:00

Dad got me these recently. Of course, I naturally will agree to share them around...... Provided y'all drink them together.

2006-10-22T06:27:00.000-07:00

Sunday evening, Baileys (thank you Chew), John Mayer, Grey's Anatomy.
Wordy post up ahead.

The killer lines, they got me thinking. None of us ever really grow up do we? We're all children. We never stop being children. Like Meredith Grey says, without parents to defy, we break the rules we make for ourselves. We never stop wanting things to go our way, we look for comfort in whoever offers it, and most of all we never stop hoping.
"Fat hope", "You wish", "Forget it". We can't say we haven't heard them all. But it really doesn't matter how many times we tell ourselves to kill the hope and save our butts some from the hurt, because ultimately we never do give hope up. Against all experience, against all logic.
Hope doesn't die. Hope just doesn't do dying. Hope is immortal.

"A couple of hundred years ago, Benjamin Franklin shared with the world the secret of his success. Never leave that till tomorrow, he said, which you can do today. This is the man who discovered electricity. You think more people would listen to what he had to say.

I don't know why we put things off, but if I had to guess, I'd have to say it has a lot to do with fear. Fear of failure, fear of rejection, sometimes the fear is just of making a decision, because what if you're wrong? What if you're making a mistake you can't undo?

The early bird catches the worm. A stitch in time saves nine. He who hesitates is lost. We can't pretend we hadn't been told. We've all heard the proverbs, heard the philosophers, heard our grandparents warning us about wasted time, heard the damn poets urging us to seize the day. Still sometimes we have to see for ourselves. We have to make our own mistakes. We have to learn our own lessons. We have to sweep today's possibility under tomorrow's rug until we can't anymore. Until we finally understand for ourselves what Benjamin Franklin really meant. That knowing is better than wondering, that waking is better than sleeping, and even the biggest failure, even the worst, beat the hell out of never trying."
------Grey's Anatomy

2006-10-16T06:54:00.000-07:00

Insanely gorgeous, no? Asked Mum and she said she'll wait for my results. Zomgsuicide. And Dad said Christmas. Christmas?! Does anybody realise I'm not getting any younger? I don't want my frixxing bracelet only when I start growing a beard. Because you know, Tiffany&Co. + Beard = Total Disaster.
Eck, I'm hanging a smaller stocking over my fireplace this year then. Okay that was lame, fireplace.

Anyway, should be gone/going. Laurie the Butt-And-A-Half said otherwise there'd be no more Bailey's mudpies. Ew blackmail ew.

2006-10-08T07:58:00.000-07:00

I see our world as disintegrating.

If we were as poor as the farmers in Indonesia, we really wouldn't give a hoot about preserving the environment. All we'd care about are our next meals, and if slash and burn helps us survive, then slash and burn it is.

So to all these people calling the Indonesians "inconsiderate fuckers"? At least you're lucky enough to be born Singaporean, so even if you have asthma, wear a mask/fishbowl and shut your trap, you selfish buttwipe, because at least you don't have to starve.
Your lack of compassion is absofuckinglutely radiant and in Woody Allen's words, thanks for being such a credit to your race.

Right.

Kisses, hugs and all that mush, you know I just adore the shamelessly self-centered stinking (Alliteration!) lot of you.

Now pardon me while I try and get myself to glow under my UV light.

2006-10-08T02:24:00.000-07:00

If you lick me ten times you'll consume one calorie.

Blogger sucks, time for xanga?

2006-10-08T01:16:00.000-07:00

Can you say Liberation?(!!!!)
My hiatus actually did me no good because when I wasn't blogging I was watching teevwee. Bad hiatus, bad, bad hiatus.
And yeah it's been a little more than ages, being two days late really doesn't make that much of a difference. Besides, I was too busy mocking the people that're still having promos. (Side note: Ha, haha, haaa!) That's right, I have no life.

I'm drowning and nobody wants to save me:( This is so sad. My life is so sad. I shall slit my wrists now.

Animal Square + Prada?

2006-09-05T08:35:00.000-07:00

Twenty (and a few more) days to the exams and I don't feel a thing. I'm like...... First paper on the 28th, 11 topics of Biology, 10 of Chem, uhhhh hey let's go shopping tomorrow!
I know, right? I'm crazy. I blame it on the limewater I drank on accident in Sec One. Yes it was an accident I swair.

So I've like, decided. (Gosh this is all so exciting, me! Getting to decide something! Oh yay!) I won't blog till the exams are all over. And I'll turn into a total book slut whoa nigga whoaaaaaa. So the rest of you had better not blog as well! Then I wouldn't have to come online and read your entries. RAWRRRRRAWR>>>>>

I don't spit out the seeds when I eat rambutans.

Kbye.

2006-09-03T04:32:00.000-07:00

Yeah what an old song but you know, hello there, this is just and only for you. Because I'm crazy like that. And no, it's not Squishy I'm talking about hahahahaha.

There are no guarantees but if it means
there's even a possibility
then I'll give up whatever it takes
I know I've made some mistakes before
It may be just another closed door
But we could be together
for a while

If you say jump I'd say how high
If you said run you know I'd fly
Just for the chance
Just for the moment
Should the moment pass us by
and if you ask once I'll tell you twice
I'll ignore the world's advice
if we could be together
for a while

Hurrr forgot to post this up. June, Tzelin and my darling Piyopiyo the Pimpmeister.

Anyway, ew. It's a massacre of braincells trying to express myself. My English has gone all awry as of late, must start reading obsessively after the exams to brush up.
Oh Christmas, hurry up already. (YES I'M AWARE IT'S ONLY SEPTEMBER, SHUT UP OR I'LL KEEEEL YOU)

I am suddenly struck with the notion (EDIT: Insert "that". ARE YOU HAPPY NOW JOSEPH ARE YOU HAPPY?!!?!?!) I am very much wasting away. And I'm not even sixteen yet.

2006-09-01T06:12:00.000-07:00

Welcome to the club, Twee!

DON'T JUDGE ME!!!!!!
Alright Gooteniteairfreebotty. Sleep loose loose, haha, haha......... Aiya not funny.

2006-08-30T08:45:00.000-07:00

Heyyyyy I've forgotten the name of Voldemort's snake! Nini? Nana? Narnina? Narnini? Ninarni? Nanarni? NUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-=steve91=- says:
Hi be friend?
-=steve91=- says:
I find ur email on ur web
-=steve91=- says:
Do u speak English?
Ohmyxodletskiss says:
no, do you?

"I proceed to crawl my way into and through the evening drowning my Sims (Version 2.0) in swimming pools by removing the ladders.
Occasionally I would find myself in Ngee Ann City, staring blankly at a Hello Kitty stuffed toy waiting for it to, oh I don't know, strike up a bloody conversation."

No link! No link!

2006-08-30T08:42:00.000-07:00

Goodgosh how to find the words, how to find the words. Exdyamination period and I'm still sieveing through my archives. It's all very amusing, though.

On a different note, my braces are (is?) being a bitch. I have no idea why I decided you should know that, but I never know why I say the things I say half the time anyway. Thank goodness for ceramic braces though, metal ones make some look cute but put me in a bunny suit and I'll still remain as cute as a telephone.

Harrrrrrrr.

Breed Hate With:

Pride
Jealousy
Sloth
Regret
Cautiousness
Carelessness
Insecurity

Moderation is a saint. Everything in excess is galling.
Including compassion, money, time, devotion, freedom, beauty, hope and love.

And chocolate.
I will not stuff myself silly. I will not stuff myself silly. I will not silly myself stuff.

2006-08-26T04:28:00.000-07:00

What the hey you're super fuxxored, you know that? I wish your ego'd stop being so icky-big; it's suffocating me. But forget you.

Italy was ass good, I miss :( And as was my fur coat. Yay fatty!
Stunning resemblance, innit.

2006-08-21T06:33:00.000-07:00

HI STEFFERSSSSSS I LUP CHOO!!!!!!!!!!!
<7777,______

2006-08-14T08:47:00.000-07:00

How come everytime you come around
My London London Bridge wanna go down
Like, "London London Londy" wanna go down

OH SNAP ABSOLUT KURANT'S TEH SEXXXX DOUBLE WHAMMY! I SHALL PROCEED TO TYPE THE WHOLE ENTRY IN CAPTITASL I MEAN CAPITALS BECAUSE THEY'RE HELLA IN YOUR FACE AND I LIKE IT LIKE THAT OH! AND I PROMISE NOT TO USE BACKSPACE! OR DELETE>>>>>!

GOTTA LOVE ALEXANDER MCQUEEN

PIMEI'S TOKEN OF OUR FRIENDSHIP

YOU SUPERSTAR, YOU

YAY KOTA TINGGI NO SHIT!!!!!!!!!

ANYWAY JASON YOU'RE MY NUMERO UNO SO CHIN UP, SOLDIER
AND TO END IT ALL OFF HELLO PORYEEEEE<333 STOP TELLING ME TO GET A LIFE WHEN YOU DON'T HAVE HALF A ONE! HAHA KEEEEEDING.

SUPERCALIFRAJILISBICXPIALIDOUCIOUS!

2006-08-11T03:59:00.000-07:00

Ele, you crazy-gorgeous, the story was pure love. "Insanely beautiful collarbones", mmhmm.

Anywho made lemon cupcakes with Evangelyn and Pimei. Didn't look like the prettiest things once we piled on the nutella and pink frosting, but what the hey. In the mouth they were better than orgasms. No, srsly.

And much love to Slutcake who brought Zeeruey over! Dyammmz hahahha

P.S. ALL MY HOES: I'LL LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LONG TIME HAHA<333333

Watch yourself, sweetheart, and closely if you will; because I'm just waiting. I have so much/too much to say to you, to say about you. But (just for now) they'll stay under wraps. This twisted system rejects the gift to forget. And yes, I happen to know it's a gift.

2006-08-09T05:29:00.000-07:00

"You know when you're freezing and your hands start to shake, then you go to the toilet for a piss and your pee's !#@$(*% flaming? That's how i feel about you now."
Whaaaaattttt, hahahaha please tell me that's a good thing, Mikey!

If love is stupid, then I stupid you muchly Suanmei!

ANDDD HEY THERE JENNY HAN ZIYING! HAHA, HAHA, BIO KID
I can never get enough of these

Mygad, I miss the year of messy eyebrows, short hair, being braces-less and identity crisises (Not really). AND THE LACK OF POLITICS RAWRARWRAWR

This entry did not just end on a bad note.

2006-08-06T07:03:00.001-07:00

My cousins are currently screaming Hips Don't Lie in the lounge. They are male.
It's Monday tomorrow. There's school. My mood's not the prettiest of things. (Oh look I just won the State-the-Obvious contest, y'all!)
WHY YOU ALL UP IN MY GRILL, MY, MY, MY GRILL

(How apt)

2006-08-03T06:12:00.000-07:00

May I be angsty? Time to muse.

You know, it's incredibly hard to forget pain, but it's even harder to remember kindness given to us. We have no scars to show for joy; we learn so little from peace. Such is men, sad, grudging, but sober. What's the line from Grey's Anatomy? "Maybe we like the pain. Maybe we're wired that way. Because without it, I don't know; maybe we just wouldn't feel real. What's that saying? Why do I keep hitting myself with a hammer? Because it feels so good when I stop."
Yeah, Meredith Grey; real dynamite lines.

On another issue, maybe it's time to stop being scared. After all, we only see monsters because they want us to see monsters everywhere. They've conditioned us to look for monsters under our beds, to see them in every shadow. As long as we keep seeing monsters, we'll continue to need protection, and that's when we deal control of our own lives into the hands of others. I think I've read a similar quote somewhere before. At the risk of sounding corny, the odd sensation of dejavu is echoing in my ribs.

Anyway, AdMath was inspiring.

A brandy on the harbour, a dulling for the day.
A marriage of convenience, and only for the gray
A last breath to seventy six while he lies on his bed
A last fantasy, a last question, a last voice in his head
A smile on the nymphette; a marriage of convenience
The end is stronger than the brandy choking up her conscience
Languid eyes on the prize; inheritance of her life
Might as well, might as well, cyanide and a knife

"As long as I can use you, as long as I will use you."

2006-07-31T02:24:00.000-07:00

Props to Chew the spazz! (Yes, we're all lovely retarded like that.) And hell she can rhyme!

Schweety pie schweety pie I don't mind if I wait
Just let me get a sniff of you so I might salivate
You make my knees go jelly when we do it in your van,
Ooh baby, baby, baby, please be my man!
Honey, oh honey I think I have an issue!
Spending days in your dumpster looking for your tissue!
So sugar, oh sugar, now won't you take my hand?
I've been to eighty bridal stores I've found my Vera Wang!

IT'S ONLY A POEM PLEASE DON'T JUDGE ME HAHAAA

2006-07-31T00:07:00.000-07:00

Who's currently laughing at the most bizarre song titles available. From "They Punctured My Yolk" to "The Wizard Turns On... The Giant Silver Flashlight And Puts On His Werewolf Moccasins"... Why so cool, Damon?

U-G-L-Y, You could make an onion cry! Brrr yes, cheer fever (Ooh ooh oxymoron!)
Kkkkk I'm pretty vacant tonight so I'll end off with missing Venice terribly.

(Getcherr sexy on)

2006-07-29T08:53:00.000-07:00

From six months ago,

"I seem to have accumulated numerous records of "chats" with people I really can't stand as of late, and I've decided to present one that almost gave me a stroke.

This is a conversation I and an boy from Broadrick Sec had.

A: hihi
B: who are you?
A: hahax i noe u but u dunno me

Damnit I always want to barf when someone says that. I decided to ignore him after that statement, thinking he would take a hint and piss off, but...

A: hihi
A: hihi u dere?
A: hihi
B: WHAT?
A: lols nothing jux wna say hi
B: okay okay HI.
A: happy new yr
B: same to you
A: lols
A: =)
A: u noe my clsmate saes u veh pretty
B: oh, really.
A: yup
A: dun u wan noe who my clsmate is?
B: uhhh, let me see, how about no?
A: lols

There was silence for a while, and I was getting ready to perform a happy dance when...

A: hihi
B: whaaaaaaaaat, again?
A: yup lols
A: i think ure lonely =)
B: and where the hell did you infer that from?
A: lols i dno jux feel ure lonely
A: =)
B: then what, you want to be my stead is it?
A: hee okies
B: .............FUCK OFF LAH
A: diaoz.
A: u make me beri angry

And he sure wasn't joking about the angry part. He went offline for an awesome ten minutes, probably in an attempt to make me remorseful, and then...

A: hihi"

And now I present le sequel, (cliche)RETURN OF BROADRICK BOY(end cliche)

A: hihi
A: hihi
B: what a refreshing new style of greeting!
A: lols tanks
A: bud it's not new
B: OH, THE SHOCK
A: lols
A: =)
A: do u still wan t stead?
B: OMG sure!!!! why not?!!! i mean like, i'm super touched you're still keeping me in mind on your list of could-be girlfriends after sooooooooo many months
A: hees
A: yayeeeeeee tanks dear dear =)))
B: oh welcome my honey poochums sweetie pie!
A: =)
A: lols u knw last time u scared half t deaf me
B: honest? to deaf? that's hot.
A: lols sorrie death*
B: oh my gosh really! i'm soooo sorry
B: can i make it up to you by offering some advice?
B: please,
B: Get Scared Half To Death Twice.
A: lols okie dear =)
B: OMG JOY!

A whole ten minutes later,

A: eh wat
A: wait*
A: u meanie
A: u make me beri angry!!!!

And then he dumped me.(Cue sulk)

2006-07-21T08:50:00.000-07:00

Scene boys are so ewfuxno.

I'm bringing sexy back
them motherf***ers don't know how to act
Come let me make up for the things you lack
Cause you're burning up, I've got to get it fast
(Take it to the bridge)

Dirty babe, you see these shackles
Baby I'm your slave
I'll let you whip me if I misbehave
It's just that no one makes me feel this way

Cyanide and Happiness! Just stare at their expressions!

2006-07-17T05:53:00.000-07:00

PLEASE, PLEASE TREAT THIS AS A LAST FAVOUR TO ME, AND READ EVERY DAMNED SINGLE WORD, DON'T BLINK OR YOU MIGHT SKIP ONE, AND GOD ONLY KNOWS HOW MUCH MORE DAMAGE THAT CAN DO TO US.

Good God I can't believe I have to resort to using my blog as an outlet. To say the least, it's fucking pathetic. But there's no other way I can talk to you anymore, I'll acknowledge this. And here I was contentedly thinking the last time was enough to make you understand that I need to know when you're unhappy about something, even if something is a result of my actions. My need derives from my concern for you. Because that's what friends do you know, care for each other. But you don't respect my need, and it fucking hurts, and yet you act as if you're feeding my insatiable appetite for your pain. Gee, I never knew I was a fucking sociopath in your eyes. I told you a friendship cannot be sustained if there is no balance, no give and take, and since in your eyes you have already assumed the place of the giver, you shove me into being the taker, then even when I try to contribute you push me away and ultimately you tell me I'm selfish. Then what the fuck do you want out of me? To fuckbrainedly sit here and watch you fucking hurt and be accused of wanting to do nothing to help all the time, of being apathetic? In case you haven't noticed, and in case the realization didn't dawn on you even when I told you outright, that's the complete oppo-fucking-site of my intentions. If opening my mouth equates hurting you then I'll shut my fucking trap. If that's the only way I can give to you then that's the way I'll work. I hope you read this entry ASAP, because you say you can't stand it any longer, but I've already decided to give up. I hope now that I've put it into something you can read you'll at least absorb a point or if I'm really lucky, two, because it seems you tuned off completely when we talked the last fucking time. If I knew you'd always be hurt by us then I'd rather it have been just us girls from the damned start, or just you and your original three cronies. I should have known all I am to you is a fucking charity. And even then when giving's supposed to be a joy, I am a charity you find it a chore to give to. Wait, let's rephrase that, I NEVER KNEW I WAS A DUTY OF YOURS. Happy happy joy joy! I've always thought we were more than this, we were actually friends, and I was even convinced we were so close to being best of (gasp!), but I guess I've finally gotten it into my thick skull that you know different.

2006-07-12T06:47:00.000-07:00

Because I'm feeling mentally challenged today, yo.

MY POKEMON BRING ALL THE DORKS TO THE YARD
AND THEY'RE LIKE, YOU WANNA TRADE CARDS?
LIKE, DAMN RIGHT, I WANNA TRADE CARDS
YOU CAN HAVE THIS, BUT NOT MY CHARIZARD

Kayright that's it I've outgayed myself. Yay me! +900 points!

2006-07-10T09:14:00.000-07:00

This srsly blows more than a slut. I feel so fucking small it's not even funny. Grawrrrrrrrr.

-100 points for Steffi.

"He said, you're cynical and beautiful, you always make a scene.
You're monochrome delirious, you're nothing that you seem.
I'm drowning in your vanity, your laugh is a disease.
You're dirty and you're sweet, you know you're everything to me."

2006-07-09T12:25:00.000-07:00

2006-06-30T05:24:00.000-07:00

From the nights when we were both found at our best says:
have you watched the russell peter's video?

ben} ally blocked me because i called her a dumb blonde says:
is it porn?

From the nights when we were both found at our best says:
forget it.

And on a completely different note:
Three Big Pony polos, two beef Ramlys and a full dosage of Victoria's Secret leave this girl a thoroughly contented one.

Not to mention:

WHY HELLO CRISTY BABY MY HONEY POOCHUMS SWEETIE PIE, JUST LOOK AT THAT TORSO CAPSLOCK CANNOT FULLY EXPRESS THE EXTENT OF MY FANGIRL JOY RIGHT NOW HMMM-MM-MM.

2006-06-24T05:32:00.000-07:00

One more day and it's crunch time, nigguhs. Back to work, worries, woes, weariness (ARE WE HAVING FUN YET) and... Wankers, for the sake of alliteration.

T: Brian came out with three names to name his daughters! Best, Bester, Best!
S: Err.. That's two.
T: Oh.

Fyuckit I'm so boredddddd.

2006-06-16T07:45:00.000-07:00

I want to eat clouds.

2006-06-11T07:22:00.000-07:00

CHECKIN' YER REFLECTION AND TELLIN' YER BEST FRIEND, "LIKE GIRL, I THINK MY BUTT GETTIN' BIG!"

2006-06-09T06:23:00.000-07:00

It sure as hell has been a little more than ages since I've written a heated post, and it could almost have been assumed that I've sworn off them altogether, but my gosh is this overdue.

You. Oh God, you. It's unbelievable how highly you price yourself. Your grasp of the English language is there, but the keyword is "grasp". If you were my student; great news! The damned car wash is hiring. Someone needs to put you in your place, and you know what? My five year old nephew happens to be free next week! Call me, and I'll help schedule you in. He happens to have more of a life going on than you.

And you, if people start riding you, please don't be offended. You're one hell of an ass. If your brain ever were on fire, I wouldn't even bother to piss in your ear. Oh, is your blood pressure rising already? Slit your wrists, that's the best way to lower it. Uhh, please?

Ooh, ooh, one more! I'm damned sick and tire-I GIVE UP TWITS HAVE IT SO MUCH EASIER ALWAYS ASSUMING THEIR ARGUMENTS ARE FULLY SUBSTANTIATED AND NO ONE COULD BE HOTTER

JOKERS LUH ALL OF YOU. JOKERS.

2006-06-08T07:18:00.000-07:00

Apple pie ice cream is the new sex.

This sexy beast goes by the name of Job. Say hello to Job, happy people! Job decided he was better off Chinese when he turned fifteen.

And this is Eka when I liked him better. (No seriously, what is up with the three-lettered names? Aren't they the hottest? Three-lettered names, I mean. Everything is so much easier with three letters. Name tags; registration forms; introductions. I hereby declare three-lettered names the new sex! No wait, I already said A.P.I.C was the new sex. BUT WHY AREN'T I STE? OR FFI? OR EFF? ........Okay not really.)

TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT, WHAT YOU REALLY REALLY WANT

Alright, you may just get more if you be good for me now. But if you're hot stuff you could pick the other alternative and be bad, instead. I KID I KID

2006-06-07T05:17:00.000-07:00

Oh Gosh, hahahaha, haha, ha, I guess I really can't be stopped. The mother is sooooo close to bludgeoning me to death.

And Alba's the best reason there is.